“It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us.”
“Life is a zoo in a jungle.”
“The rich aren't like us; they pay less taxes.”
“Everybody hates me because I'm so universally liked.”
“I love being a writer, what I can't stand is the paperwork.”
“Gluttony is an emotional escape, a sign something is eating us.”
“The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds -- they mature slowly.”
“There are times when parenthood seems nothing but feeding the mouth that bites you.”
“The value of marriage is not that adults produce children, but that children produce adults.”
“The difficulty with marriage is that we fall in love with a personality, but must live with a character.”
“The universe is like a safe to which there is a combination. Bit the combination is locked up in the safe.”
“When I can no longer bear to think of the victims of broken homes, I begin to think of the victims of intact ones.”
“Confession is good for the soul only in the sense that a tweed coat is good for dandruff -- it is a palliative rather than a remedy.”
“Anyone informed that the universe is expanding and contracting in pulsations of eighty billion years has a right to ask, ''What's in it for me?''”
“You can make a sordid thing sound like a brilliant drawing-room comedy. Probably a fear we have of facing up to the real issues. Could you say we were guilty of Noel Cowardice?”
“We must love one another, yes, yes, that's all true enough, but nothing says we have to like each other. It may be the very recognition of all men as our brothers that accounts for the sibling rivalry, and even enmity, we have toward so many of them.”
“I am not impressed by the Ivy League establishments. Of course they graduate the best -- it's all they'll take, leaving to others the problem of educating the country. They will give you an education the way the banks will give you money -- provided you can prove to their satisfaction that you don't need it.”