“When a man opens the car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.”
“All money nowadays seems to be produced with a natural homing instinct for the Treasury.”
“I don't think a prostitute is more moral than a wife, but they are doing the same thing.”
“We live in what virtually amounts to a museum -- which does not happen to a lot of people.”
“The biggest waste of water in the country is when you spend half a pint and flush two gallons.”