“The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.”
“Drawing on my fine command of the language, I said nothing.”
“The free-lance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps.”
“A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.”
“The biggest obstacle to professional writing is the necessity for changing a typewriter ribbon.”
“I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.”
“Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.”
“It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up, because by that time I was too famous.”
“Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about”