Who said “During the feminist seventies men were caught between a rock and a hard-on; in the…”?

“Men are what their mothers made them.”

“I only like two kinds of men; domestic and foreign.”

“Men's men: gentle or simple, they're much of a muchness.”

“I mean to make myself a man, and if I succeed in that, I shall succeed in everything else.”

“The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous toy.”

“Self-help books are making life downright unsafe. Women desperate to catch a man practice all the ploys recommended by these authors. Bump into him, trip over him, knock him down, spill something on him, scald him, but meet him.”

“Chinks in America's egalitarian armor are not hard to find. Democracy is the fig leaf of elitism.”

“Americans worship creativity the way they worship physical beauty -- as a way of enjoying elitism without guilt: God did it.”

“American couples have gone to such lengths to avoid the interference of in-laws that they have to pay marriage counselors to interfere between them.”

“Showing up at school already able to read is like showing up at the undertaker's already embalmed: people start worrying about being put out of their jobs.”

“The witty woman is a tragic figure in American life. Wit destroys eroticism and eroticism destroys wit, so women must choose between taking lovers and taking no prisoners.”