“Truth is neither alive nor dead; it just aggravates itself all the time.”
“I have not a particle of confidence in a man who has no redeeming vices.”
“By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man s, I mean.”
“The human race has but one really affective weapon, and that is laughter.”
“Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.”
“Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.”
“Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.”
“My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.”
“It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.”
“Often the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.”
“If they had not landed there would be some reason for celebrating the fact.”
“There are many scapegoats for our sins, but the most popular is providence.”
“Laughter is the greatest weapon we have and we, as humans, use it the least.”
“In statesmanship get the formalities right, never mind about the moralities.”
“It was the schoolboy who said, ''Faith is believing what you know ain't so.''”
“Everyone is like a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.”
“We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks, if we agree with him.”
“Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.”
“When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not.”
“Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.”
“The most difficult We do not deal in facts when we are contemplating ourselves.”
“One may make their house a palace of sham, or they can make it a home, a refuge.”
“Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.”
“Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.”
“There are no grades of vanity, there are only grades of ability in concealing it.”
“A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.”
“A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.”
“It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.”
“My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine -- everybody drinks water.”
“There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice.”